You are the fourth men into my life, or in other words, the fourth I’m bothered by. Two are triggered by the desire of the body, and two are from the magic of time. Unfortunately, you are the former, but the strings of time seems to be starting play leisurely in you. I am not sure. I understand the distance between us is like a chasm in the sea of stars, but I can’t stop myself, I’m still wandering on the fringes of your life, secretly looking for you, for which my deepest apology is flooding Like surging. I was advised to live life to the fullest, to fill my mind with other things, but I found that my heart had no more room, like a chest full of treasures, which could no longer hold new ones. Every new discovery fascinates me so much that I am like a persistent collector, unwilling to give up any treasure. I know it’s unfair to you, maybe only time will guide me out of this maze. Time, the merciless painter, slowly fades all paintings, just like him, him, and him, and I think you will be no exception. Only when you start a new life far away, and I still stick to the same place, can I gradually calm down my heart. I can’t guarantee that I can do it. I can’t bless you, because deep down in my heart, I hope that there is a trace of imperfection in your life, so that I can find a chance to let you notice my existence, and let fate give me a clear answer. With such a bond, I am afraid that I will eventually lose myself. I am not a brave person, I can only watch you silently behind your back, every time. I want you to see me, but I’m afraid your attention will continue to be on me. I’m like a collection of contradictions, a kind of inner struggle, I can’t hold it anymore. Looking at the night and rain outside the window, my heart could not be calm for a long time. I hope that in this late night, you can sleep peacefully and pursue your dreams. I know that I can only be a calm existence in your life, and I dare not disturb your life, but I hope you live a better life than I imagined.

Good night.